into the unknown

Every time i stare at this editor i try my best not to be too preachy but i always fail. For some time now there's a lot that has been in my mind. A lot that have been going on within, some very new. Experiences that i've never had before, some things that i'm not proud and stuff.

This semester will be my last as a VCF committee member. I remember how i came to vcf. I remember kimberly asking me if i want to become a cell group leader even before i left kuching. I was assisting Diana in the Friday cell group. Last time it used to be in campus from 12 to 2 since everyone is free. And then i moved to luke's cell group on monday i think delany and felicia were all new and shy :) I think that was my favourite cell group. Some how they made it fun and interesting. We didn't do deep bible study but always had icebreakers and some games, and some times light refreshment. And then i was asked to be in the committee.

I think i called michael telling him i could not handle this. And he said for most of the challenges in life we are not prepared for them. For most things we just go in faith. I was elected to be in the caring ministry with chuma. It was an opportunity for me to learn about myself and to learn to serve this wonderful fellowship. In the first half of our term i struggled a lot. Part of my duty is to get speakers for our fortnightly celebrations and it was not easy to find people, have them confirm and all within the time frame. I quickly learned to plan ahead and be ready for an alternative plan if things changed.

I remember that i preferred to work independently, i don't think i gave chuma a lot of opportunities, yeah like i said i learned a lot about myself. Not justifying my actions but i find it easier, less stressful not relying on people because there are a lot of things that could come up 'excuses' and stuff but i think it was a wrong move.

Being in the caring ministry opened my eyes a bit to see everyone i vcf and everyone that was not part of vcf but was suppose to be. And in my heart i always wanted the fellowship to grow, i felt so welcomed and i wanted the new students to feel the same way but for some reason over time it seemed like there was not much interest, in general among the students in the things the things that we do. Or was it that we didnt reach out to them enough. I dunno i just feel like that. And then there was the case of our previous members who joined other cell groups and didn't come anymore, some just drifted away without any reason. i guess those were the sad moments.

Last year to my shock i was elected president. I was not expecting that at all. I feel like i don't deserve the position and i fought against it be in the end with tears and an unwilling heart i went on. Our first  semester as a new committee was very shaky. We were all new to this committee thing. Making decisions for the fellowship, changing some of our long standing traditions. I guess we took some bold steps. Not sure if they were the right ones but maybe time will tell.

When i look back and  i shared this in our last meeting. I see my life in Curtin as fulfilling. I've never thought of how it would have been if i was not involved with vcf or any clubs. Maybe i'll be a nerd or a geek or not. But i know it won't be as fulfilling. I would have missed all the meetings, the birthday celebrations, the sports events, the troubles, yes those too. They make life interesting. The goodbyes, the celebrations, and all the opportunity to serve. Yes its very tiring but after the hard work is done there's yeah the word is fulfillment.

The first steps to something big can be sometimes scary because its unknown, uncharted territory, there's no preparation but when we put our trust in the one who makes all things possible, we start to see that what was scary was really nothing to be afraid of. This is the season where a new committee will be formed to run the fellowship for another year. As someone who has been there, done that i would like to confirm that God is able to keep you from falling and present you faultless... that his strength is made manifest in your weakness. That when you lack wisdom and you ask for it, you really do receive. And yes we are not worthy of any good thing we get from God, we are not worthy to lead God's people but who he called he justifies, and who he justifies he glorifies.

In closing i'm reminded to think of my challenges as opportunities to learn more about myself, about other people, and to learn to trust God because thats what faith is.

-ONWARD

it is well

First off, i want to thank God for the keeping vcf in Curtin University Sarawak campus for 10 years. When i look back at the people who have been at the helm of this great fellowship i feel so small. Of all the presidents, i can say i know three and they are all people i admire and respect for their leadership abilities.

I must say that i went to this celebration with a sour heart. Was actually thinking of all the problems that i have faced. Most of which have been my own making, coming out of my indiscipline and care-free lifestyle. I was thinking about how this fellowship would be better off if i stepped aside. But when i saw how everyone, despite all the frailty came together, whole-heartedly to make this happen, it warmed my heart. It changed something within.

Looking through all the pictures, going through all the words that was sent, thinking of how to present the video, one thing always came up. His love. How as vcf the greatest strength we have is love. Its what everyone who gets in experiences, and its what they miss when they're no longer in miri. This is something of a legacy that has been set from the earliest leaders and something we should uphold, and guard at all cost.

Today God surprised me again, when i feel like walking away, i get that gentle tug saying stay. I almost cried when sharing just before the cake cutting :)

It is well, it is well with my soul.

-ONWARD

into your hands

You know thinking about how everything went, i am reminded of my favourite psalms, 139...where can i hide from you spirit? If i go to heaven you are there, if i go to the lace of the dead you are there... i could ask the darkness to hide me but darkness is like light to you...

I don't understand why all these things happen. God knows i am still shocked and feel so unworthy of such a responsibility. He knows my heart and perceives my thoughts from afar. Looking at myself and evaluating myself i FAIL. But there's a few things i know. God is good, and he will not bring any harm to his children. God is faithful, what he says, he will do and he can be trusted. In all my life he has never failed me. So i guess whats left is for me to allow him to mould me to the person he wants me to be. 

I am scared but sometimes its not a bad thing. Please keep me in prayers and offer your advice and suggestions. For some reason i've been going through the sms pack again and Hebrews 10: 24 & 25 says let us consider how we may spur one another on towards love and good deeds. Let us not give up meeting together as some are in the habit of doing but let us encourage one another - and all the more as we see the Day approaching.

Into Your hands i commit again, my life, this fellowship, my brothers and sisters. May we be the josephs and davids and gideons and rebeccas and naomis and ruths and pauls and timothys in this time of our service. Thank you father.

~shalom~

alpha experience

Yesterday we had our first alpha gathering under vcf. Its not the first time alpha has been run in curtin, last sem the anglican students ran one and my church ran one as well. But this time VCF (Varsity Christian Fellowship) is running one for those who are new to the Christian faith or those curious.

The organisation and planning has not been good. I think we did most of the things last minute. I was really scared that we were just going to watch the video alone but God is good la. When we are not able, or prepared, He is more than able and will do things His way.

For the first gathering we had 11 people which is just enough for the 6 of us. 3 girls and 2 guys. And people you think are Christians just are not, or have questions about the Christian faith that you would not expect. I mean these are your friends, you hang out with them and they seem to fall into place. Seem ok.

Some of the questions were tough la. But as the moderator i didnt get involved with the speaking, i just asked the questions. As usual i was setting up the computer and making sure the videos worked ok. I guess i always find myself in this position.

Thank God for using us to do his work la. I really am not worthy to do these things but He is merciful enough to ask me to join in His work. You know sometimes we look at ourselves and don't see anything good in us. We see all the failures, shortcomings, weaknesses, things we cannot do but God just uses all that and does a beautiful work. Thank You God :)

~shalom~

vcf 9th anniversary

I think its nice to take some time and thank God for everything thats happened. I first want to thank God for Amanda for organising everyone and getting most of the stuff done. And Cheryl, Olly {happy birthday}, Ching Shen, Edric, Chipmunk, and everyone else i didnt mention. I know some had to put their personal work on hold just to make it. People i've not seen in a while like wee chuan. And those who had assignments but still came. 

Thank God for Oja for doing the video, i thought it was really good considering that the time and resources were short. I believe when you honor God He will honor you and nothing we do for God is a waste. I also want to thank miss Hannah for her help and ideas on what to present.

I'm really learning not to complain but to give thanks for everything. I want to apologise for the way things went. I know it could have been a lot smoother, a lot more glorifying to God and next time i think we'll do better. 

God bless you all for your effort. In the words of paul, be careful for nothing but in everything through prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God that transcends all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Puji Tuhan.

~shalom~

VCF retreat camp 2007/2008

Hi, how are you? No Ben is not back, i borrowed my friend's computer to make this post. I so need a new computer but that is another post.

So VCF had her committee retreat camp this year at Imperial Hotel, it was just for one night but considering we got the presidential suite and only had to pay lima blas ringgit i think it was well worth it. The retreat camp is usually where the old committee have their postmortem report and also where they hand over to the new committee so its more of a planning meeting than anything else. We had two meetings almost consecutively to decide what we'll be doing for the next year and the next semester seeing that this sem is all but over.

I was seriously expecting to be really worn out at the end of the meetings but surprisingly was not too tired while there. Our meeting finished at about 1+ in the morning and then we had the revelation of the angel and their masters and then supper, watched tv for a while, talk talk and only get to sleep around 3 something but it was all good except some people stealing blankets and keeping it all to themselves. Actually i should say some person, he knows who he is.

Yeah, even though it was more of meetings we still had time to for one night forget about exams in two weeks time and have fun. And of course a lot of pictures were taken, and so i will let the pictures do the talking.


these two were acting gay all retreat.


yo yo yo, its o o ja


lip roll, don't even try it.


we had good food from pong's


meeting time


worship ministry.


behold the treasurer


behold the secretary


behold the former secretary


the vice secretary

We had meetings until quite late and then supper. After that i cou'dn't sleep anymore, ended up staying late until 3 somethings before i could sleep. We all felt the effect the next day.


breakfast

We had games after a sharing by Mr. Samuel. The games was really crazy but ended up in a splash.


pose with a stranger


buy underwear


act silly in front of kfc


punish the game master


kacao the former president


take a group photograph with the president hanging in the air, wearing underwear on top of his pants.


Like i said, it ended in a splash.

~shalom~

curtin openday 2007

Yesterday we had the curtin open day. Its pretty much like Intifest only alot more fun. VCF made sushi, popiah, fruits, coconut drink, which took the thumbs of some people. Sorry to them. And we sold some books, handphone accessories, bookmarks and cds from Life Bookshop.

I was asked to help out but i didn't do much work :P. Felt bad when the soy sauce i professionally packed spilled inside the packs but Praise God we sold all the Japanese food. The coconut drink was a sellout too and with Jeffrey's help we sold off the last piece of Cheese cake way after the Chocolate cake was all gone.

There was alot of fruits still unsold. I think because of the sheer number of them, it has hard to sell. And besides most people don't like fruits. We have become an unhealthy generation.

I was suppose to come and man the booth by 2 but was late because church finished quite late but was very good. There was this Indian pastor whose name escapes me but he was very fibrant and energetic. He was talking about love {great timing!} but mostly about the love within the church not necessarily between two people. One thing he said that i find to be true is that the church was never intended to be an institution or an organisation. The church was intended to be a family. So when you come to church you were suppose to feel a sense of belonging. Naturally when things like these are said i like to look at my life and see if i'm on the good side or the bad side and things could be better. It also made me reflect on a lot of things...

After church we went to Frattinni's- they have 50% discount on pasta and pizza from 12 to 4 i think. So we ordered two pizzas and shared about ourselves. I ordered a noca latte {stupid me, who drinks coffee with Italian food anyway?}. I didn't feel it was worth it la, but it was nice to try. Pizzahut is way better. But i remember the chicken pasta i had at coffeebean. That was really good. Quite expensive but good.

Back to the openday, well nothing much was going on except for clubs selling mostly food so it was hard to spend the 10 bucks worth of coupon i bought. But i had beef Kebab from the Pakistani stand and the rest went to the cheese cake we were selling :P and honey dew. Oh and there was this sumo wrestling thing, very funny. And some guys had a stand where you can play with the nintendo wii.

There was fireworks and a lucky draw at the end. Unfortunately my number {1311} won nothing, no wii, no ipod, no nothing. At the end i was tired worn out but couldn't sleep. I think it was the coffee.

{pictures}

opening a Jap-resturant soon.


can you see my fingerprint on the glass?


I only took the coffee because it was hot.


father and son playing tennis on the wii


main stage, there was alot of nice performances here. I forgot to mention, the first curtin idol was held. My friend didnt win but she got to the finals. But i was late to see her sing. Oh and VCF did a performance which i thought was the best given that we were not allowed to sing anything with Jesus or God in it, don't want to 'offend' anyone they said.


our booth


i like this shot


I like this one, talk about best for last.

~shalom~

thank you Father

Got back from the VCF camp last night {sunday night}. The camp was great, lots of fun but the main reason why we went was not lost in all the fun. I must say, atleast for me the highlight of the camp was the talentshow.

We were all divided into groups according to certain bible characters. I was in Noah and we were asked to present some kind of drama or song well naturally we decided a drama was the way to go. I have videos but i'm having trouble uploading them but besides our group i think the drama by Moses was very good. Every team was very creative in the way they presented these bible stories and it made for a really fun time.

thank you Father
For some reason yesterday{monday morning} when i got up to pray i could not help but just say thank You Father for everything. Sometimes i feel this way. I was singing one of my favourite songs by i think its Paul Baloche - offering. There's a line that goes...

I bring an offering of worship to my king
no one on earth deserves the praises that i bring
Jesus may you receive the honor that you're due
Oh Lord I bring an offering to you.

And for some reason those words just hit me real strong, i was thinking here i am in the midst of people who love the Lord, and i was thinking of those people who shared the word of God to me, and how it must have been a struggle sometimes for them because i also go through struggles when it comes to sharing my faith. And how it must have been a sacrifice for them but God used them anyway. And those people who must have been praying for me to be saved, called out God's mercy on this naughty little boy. And here i am... Alvin Slaughter in his song run to you says ...surprised to be loved. The emotions just overwhelmed me, and with tears i just thank God for everything, everything i get to enjoy, every trip, camp, every experience. I like to say God is pure good. :)

Recent event have got me worried, yesterday i got some bad news but i know in all things God works it out for the good of them who love him and as i was just going through some word to help me through this one thing that kept appearing is the love of God especially in Romans 8:35 nothing can s-e-p-a-r-a-t-e us from the love of God, nothing. And that became some kind of help to me. Only a few people understand what i'm talking about and i'll like to keep it that way but all i can say is pray for your friends. God can do anything.

pictures time

first thing i saw in the toilet was this little bugger.


signpost


Noah


Jeremy, Kelly, and someone


Remember i said we had games? This was one of them. We came first in these games


LOok at all the food we had to eat


Li ai and there he is again!


We had to cross this river to get to the other side where the cave is.


my first time on a boat. Look how scared ooja was.


the other end of the boat.


we took the wrong turn at some point in the journey but this sign was reassuring


even though it was raining, they kept singing all the way


that explains alot


after walking for hours we came here and the path was under construction


they were selling drinks and some crafts.

The camp committee decided it was not safe to go through the path under construction so we did a fun thing; walk back.


this is an alternative path but its longer and they say mud can get up to your knees. We passed.


we got back and guess what we did.


eating


my room


they spelt my name wrong, where got L?


my roomies


look at all the cool people with cool t-shirts. At this point we were getting ready to leave.


no we didn't have the camp in the bush, we just had to stop.

I can't possibly post all the pictures i took here. Well actually i could but it would get very long but you can look at some more over at my flickr page. Or to get another perspective of the camp try this one.

I really thank God for my phone, it made the camp more fun, and i could share with y'all.

~shalom~

batu niah camp

I'm going away on a camp tomorrow for the weekend. We'll be going to niah cave, my first cave experience in miri and in malaysia.

I dont really like caves, they're cold and they have bats and insects and other creepy things. But i hope we won't be spending alot of time in the cave. I really look forward to having fun and fellowship with people.

So thats about it, will update with pictures when i get back.

~shalom~